One week ago today, I stood and gave a eulogy at the funeral service of my beloved Granddaddy, known to us as Pop. Prior to the service, I’ll be honest, I didn’t know if I would be able to get up and speak. But, by God’s grace, I was able to. I first shared the words my mama had written (that I hope to share here soon) and then I spoke my own words. Since I wrote and spoke these words (or very close to what is written here – I used this as a guide), I have thought of SO much more. But, I hope you’ll see in these words the man he was and will always be to me and to the family and friends that love him so.
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Being the granddaughter of Jack Parks is a blessing that would be impossible to fully put into words. What I will say today won’t come even close to all that he was and will always be to me, but I hope that I can do some justice to all he meant to this family.
In recent years, since Macey, our oldest daughter, learned to talk, he’s been known as Pop. But, growing up, I started out calling him Granddaddy Jack and then when my brother Charlie came along he started calling him “Jack” which stuck. Sometimes when we were younger, people would wonder if he was okay with being called “Jack” by his grandkids and the answer is – yes, he was fine with it. I really think he loved it. Odds are, I bet there are those of you in this congregation that knew him as “Uncle Jack” even if you aren’t officially related to us and, believe me, he loved THAT too.
He was a man who lived by faith and loved his family and his friends. Jack was the kind of granddaddy that every kid should have. He was never, or VERY VERY rarely, too tired to play with us. When we were around grade school ages, he worked the 7a-3p shift at Coats and Clark and would get home from work around 4pm. Well, about that time we’d be hanging around after school, homework done (most of the time) and ready to PLAY with him. He would take us swimming in the pond sometimes after work when the weather was nice. Now, I wouldn’t stick a toe in there today, but back then it was the best swimming hole around and if Jack was in there, so was I! He taught me to swim underwater in that pond. And, he would get out the old aluminum boat he had, row us out into the middle and then let us try to sink that boat. Oh, we would try and TRY to sink that boat, but it wouldn’t sink. He knew that, naturally, but he let us have fun trying. Charlie and I had many an adventure with Jack including hunting, fishing, camping, riding the tractor, going to Hardees for breakfast before school, rambling around on ATVs and more. He was the absolute epitome of an involved and loving granddaddy.
Pop would take me deer hunting with him when I was a little girl too. He was an avid hunter and always enjoyed deer season. He took me to the stands with him MANY a time knowing full well, I believe, that with me around he wasn’t likely to get a shot. For one thing, I would always think I had to pack us a snack for the stand. I’m pretty sure that deer can smell peanut butter on saltines a mile away, but Pop let me pack the snacks and haul them up into the stand most times anyway. One of the sweetest memories I have of our deer hunting times was the time we had sat for awhile and saw NOTHING, so he took out his pocket knife and carved a heart with our initials in that tree. He sat up higher in the deer stand on the seat and I sat below him where I could see out too. He didn’t say a word that day, but he got out that pocket knife and quietly carved our initials and grinned that Jack grin at me while he worked. I don’t know where that tree even IS, but I love knowing that he made such a sweet gesture just for me.
Jack taught Charlie and me many things. Like I said, he taught me to swim underwater in that pond. He also taught me to drive a stick shift and let me practice by driving an old truck around and around their yard and land. He even let me drive into town before I had my learners license. Oh, I thought I was big stuff then…that is…until we saw a police car in town. I froze. I choked that truck out several times in a row on the highway, so Pop just laughed and had me sputter into a parking lot so he could take over behind the wheel. Macey knows that I first learned to drive about the time I was 12, so she started asking if she could learn this coming summer when SHE turns 12 too. Well, Pop found out about this and it thrilled him. We stayed with Gran and Pop over Thanksgiving break this past year and one day Pop got in his truck and took off for a little while. When he got back, he let Mama know that he had gone to put gas in the truck so Macey could drive. It wouldn’t do for anything else to happen other than Mama had to get Macey out in that truck (in her lap, of course) and let her drive. Pop sat on the porch and watched – happy as a clam. The only thing he DID NOT like was that they didn’t drive long enough for his liking. He said he had put twenty dollars worth of gas in that truck and they didn’t drive enough. That was our Pop – always giving and wanting to do for his family.
Pop and Gran are the best grandparents in the world and, let me just say, they are also the best GREAT grandparents. Oh, how he loved his great grandbabies. The only thing that ever bothered him was that he just couldn’t get down and play with them like he really wanted to. But seeing them and being around them gave him great joy. And, when he COULD interact and play with them, he did. Our youngest, Mariana, got a doctor kit for Christmas and bought it down when we came to visit. Oh, he got the biggest kick out of her giving him check-ups during our visit. He typically would call her “Little Bit”, but after that he started to call her “Doc.” And, he always loved hearing stories of our children. In the fall before picture day, Mariana made a remark that she had on her “pretty face” that day. Gran told Pop about that and so he started referring to HIS pretty face and he would ask if we had on our pretty faces from day to day. These children brought so much joy to him, just as Charlie and I, and Mama and Lawrence before us, always did.
I got to spend this past Wednesday in the hospital with Pop and that is a day that I just feel so blessed to have had. When he was at home, he LOVED watching The Western Channel. Those cowboys, indians and outlaws were his companions. They didn’t have that channel at the hospital, to his dismay. Well, on Wednesday morning I cued up John Wayne’s movie “Hondo” on my iPad and he got to watch that before PT came to rake him over the coals – I mean, work with him. Netflix on the iPad wasn’t the Western channel, but he liked it. After PT, he was worn out, so he napped in the chair. I was hungry, so I got out a packet of peanut M&Ms and quietly tried to open them. Well, he heard me. He asked me what I was eating and when I said M&Ms, well…he had to have some. And, of course, I gave them to him. Even though he had not eaten anything off his lunch tray but ice cream. The man loved his sweets, what can I say?! He and I hung out that day and just took it easy as we could, except when PT was working with him. We watched Bonanza and The Rifleman. We didn’t do a whole lot of talking, but were just comfortable and content just being together….just him and me. And, I cannot even say how thankful I am to have had that time.
On Wednesday, Pop asked me if I thought he’d go home tomorrow, meaning Thursday. I was honest with him and told him no, that I thought he’d be in the hospital for awhile longer, but that if we worked hard on breathing exercises and PT, he would get to go home soon. He told me okay. Well, now that I think about it, Pop did go home on Thursday. Only, he didn’t go home to his favorite country place, he went to his eternal home in heaven. As much as we’re all going to miss him, I know we also celebrate that he’s in heaven and he’s whole again. I can just imagine him being reunited with his daddy who he absolutely ADORED and being together again with his “Buddy” Lawrence who he also completely adored. And, of course, I just imagine the joy he felt when he saw Jesus face to face. I have heard it said that those who have gone on to glory really wouldn’t trade places with those of us here, and I take comfort in that. He’s really HOME. I don’t know if there’s a greeting committee when we get to heaven, but, if there is, I hope Pop is at the head of mine when I get there so that I know I’m in the right place.
As I close, I reflect on a saying that gives me great comfort: “Thank you, Lord, for the pain we feel. It is the price we pay for having loved someone so much. It is worth it.” I am so grateful that I was loved so much by such an amazing granddaddy and that I got to love him so much in return. The pain of losing him sometimes washes over me like a tidal wave, but for having gotten to be his and have him be mine makes it worth it. For forty and a half years, I was his “Boo” and he was my “Jack” and that will bless me for the rest of my days until I see that precious man again one day, as I know I will.
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We miss you so much, Pop, and will always love you. But we know that heaven is amazing and we trust we’ll see you there one sweet day.
Love always,
Boo
One of my favorite photos I took of Pop recently. This was in September 2014 at one of Macey’s soccer matches, the day before both of our girls were baptized. 