Uncategorized

Hey, y’all!

Once again, I’m dusting the cobwebs off the old blog. Only this time, it’s with a revamp. Not only have I changed the name of the blog, but the layout is new also (thanks, honey) and I truly do hope and plan to keep the content more updated.

Coffee With Kel is not only the newly minted name of my blog, but it’s also reflective of my mission to connect with people. If you know me, I’m a people person. I just flat out love people. I have recently discovered that I do have some introvert tendencies blended in with my extrovert ways, but that’s a post for another day. (Note to self: add to the post ideas list.) Since I enjoy building relationships and fostering friendships AND there’s the calling I feel to be an encourager to others, I decided that this blog could very well be a great outlet for all of that. If you know me, you’ll know that I am a girl who loves some coffee – especially first thing in the morning. I’m pretty sure that what motivates me to get moving as much as not wanting the girls to be tardy for school is knowing I can get a cup of coffee when I get to the kitchen. It just starts my day out in such a comforting and familiar way. So, I started thinking about how cool it would be if the blog were like a coffee house of sort – a welcome gathering place. Just like THAT…an idea was born.

When I first started kicking around the idea in my head, mulling it over mostly just before I went to sleep because that’s when my brain has to think ALL the thoughts, of course, I felt excited and also a little nervous. After all, I haven’t been the most consistent blogger there ever was by a WAY long shot. But, the more I pondered it, the more ideas came to mind for blog posts and sharing. I started to keep ideas in the notepad on my phone. I started to think — okay, I think this can happen. So, I talked to Mickey about it and he was all over the idea. So, I kept brainstorming and coming up with concepts and such. He bought the domain names, got the new theme set up, etc. So, here we are…on the verge of something almost brand new. It’s a work in progress and I hope you’ll come along with me on this journey and share if you feel so lead. My prayer is that this blog will be uplifting, encouraging, good for some laughs, and, really, I pray that you find kinship here.

Blessings,
Kelly

And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is LOVE…
1 Corinthians 13:13

Good gracious! It’s been a minute since I updated my blog. Wow. I didn’t mean to let it sit this long without an update. My intentions were good, but my follow through? Not so much. And, that leads me right into a goal I have for 2016 which is going beyond intentions and being more intentional. I know, that’s been a buzz word for a little while now. Maybe it’s even over-used in some circles, for all I know. But, it’s an honest-to-goodness goal for mine for this coming year. And, if I dust off the cobwebs of this blog and put my goals out there for, basically, THE WORLD (or all three of you who happen upon it) to see, then I have accountability to go with it.  So, there’s THAT.

Before I post about next year’s goals, I am still reflecting back on the last year. 2015 — well, it was a year. And, frankly, it was a year that was all over the place. In January, we unexpectedly lost my beloved Pop and my heart broke with the loss of him here. I still miss him every single day even though I do take comfort in the fact that he’s healed and whole in the presence of Jesus. (You can read my eulogy for him here.) Even with some health issues and some other dips in the road along the way, 2015 was, by far, not a bad year. In autumn, Macey got to return to the soccer field after a foot injury sidelined her in the spring. It was great to see our girl back out there on the field getting after the sport she loves so much! We also got to see Mariana dance in the spring AND again in December in Nutcracker Swings and it’s also just wonderful watching her thrive in dance! 2015 gave our family many great memories such as hiking adventures, our first tent camping trip, a crazy fun beach trip with friends and MORE! So much more! And, I went back to work after being a stay at home mom for 13 years. I absolutely love my new job and I find that great working relationships AND dear new friendships are the best benefit there is! 2015 had its valleys and peaks, so when I look back on it, I see the good that was there and I thank God for His graciousness over every circumstance of our lives.

Now, on to 2016 goals. I’m trying to make them attainable and not lofty so that I can achieve them. These aren’t in any particular order:

• Going beyond intentions to being intentional. I confess: I do intentions well. When it comes to the best of intentions, I’m rocking it. I mean, how many times have I said to a friend “Let’s get coffee sometime” FULLY and COMPLETELY wanting to do just that?! And, then no one plans it. I don’t get on Google calendar and mark out the date and time right then and there. WHY?! It’s because I have intentions and I’m not always being as intentional as I should be. Because, really, it doesn’t take much to go that extra step and say “Okay, yes! Let’s have coffee…and let’s get it on the calendar!” Things like that are what I’m working on being better about doing. Yes, I’m busy and yes, things get away from me sometimes. I think we can all relate. But, can’t we also relate to how awesome it is to connect with the people we care about? I need to do it at home too. Date nights? BEST of intentions. And, we maybe do a few a year. That’s going to get better. INTENTIONALLY. So, just be warned, loved ones — I’m on a mission!
• More Bible in my life. This is another one where it’s totally a gimme for a Christian, right? But, really do want to get more into The Word. God’s Word never returns void and I just always need more in my life. And, what else is there, really, to say on this? Besides – YES!!
• Focus on health; mind, body and spirit. I’m sure that this is one that is, in some form or another, on everyone’s list. Let’s be honest, January is resolution month at the gym, is it not? BUT, this isn’t about pledging to work out eleventy billion hours a year or to weigh X amount or anything like that. For me, it’s just about being more healthy overall. Making healthier choices. That doesn’t mean I won’t splurge because as long as there is chocolate and sour patch kids in this world — HELLO. But, it just means making overall better choices for myself and for us as a family. This will start with The Whole 30 for Mickey and me in January, so expect some posts along those lines. Health of mind, body and spirit also goes along with being in my Bible more. Being an encourager and being around people who encourage me are also ways to accomplish this goal, starting at home.
• Blog more. This blog gets neglected, but it’s a great outlet for me. And, it’s a great connecting place too. So, I really need to try to do better about keeping it updated.
• Have more FIRSTS. I don’t have any clue what this will look like, but I enjoy firsts. Like how we took the girls tent camping for the first time this past year. And, how Macey learned to snow ski for the first time. So, I want us to experience some firsts, individually and as a family, this coming year.

So, that’s five goals. And, maybe that’s just a good starting point. But, I think they are five things worth striving for in the new year. If you’re reading this, feel free to hold me accountable because that’s why I posted, after all.

As we put 2015 behind us, I hope we can all look back, no matter the circumstances, and see some good in the year we had. Here’s to 2016 – may we face it with faith, hope and LOVE.

Blessings,
Kelly 

One week ago today, I stood and gave a eulogy at the funeral service of my beloved Granddaddy, known to us as Pop. Prior to the service, I’ll be honest, I didn’t know if I would be able to get up and speak. But, by God’s grace, I was able to. I first shared the words my mama had written (that I hope to share here soon) and then I spoke my own words. Since I wrote and spoke these words (or very close to what is written here – I used this as a guide), I have thought of SO much more. But, I hope you’ll see in these words the man he was and will always be to me and to the family and friends that love him so.

****************

Being the granddaughter of Jack Parks is a blessing that would be impossible to fully put into words. What I will say today won’t come even close to all that he was and will always be to me, but I hope that I can do some justice to all he meant to this family.

In recent years, since Macey, our oldest daughter, learned to talk, he’s been known as Pop. But, growing up, I started out calling him Granddaddy Jack and then when my brother Charlie came along he started calling him “Jack” which stuck. Sometimes when we were younger, people would wonder if he was okay with being called “Jack” by his grandkids and the answer is – yes, he was fine with it. I really think he loved it. Odds are, I bet there are those of you in this congregation that knew him as “Uncle Jack” even if you aren’t officially related to us and, believe me, he loved THAT too.

He was a man who lived by faith and loved his family and his friends. Jack was the kind of granddaddy that every kid should have. He was never, or VERY VERY rarely, too tired to play with us. When we were around grade school ages, he worked the 7a-3p shift at Coats and Clark and would get home from work around 4pm. Well, about that time we’d be hanging around after school, homework done (most of the time) and ready to PLAY with him. He would take us swimming in the pond sometimes after work when the weather was nice. Now, I wouldn’t stick a toe in there today, but back then it was the best swimming hole around and if Jack was in there, so was I! He taught me to swim underwater in that pond. And, he would get out the old aluminum boat he had, row us out into the middle and then let us try to sink that boat. Oh, we would try and TRY to sink that boat, but it wouldn’t sink. He knew that, naturally, but he let us have fun trying. Charlie and I had many an adventure with Jack including hunting, fishing, camping, riding the tractor, going to Hardees for breakfast before school, rambling around on ATVs and more. He was the absolute epitome of an involved and loving granddaddy.

Pop would take me deer hunting with him when I was a little girl too. He was an avid hunter and always enjoyed deer season. He took me to the stands with him MANY a time knowing full well, I believe, that with me around he wasn’t likely to get a shot. For one thing, I would always think I had to pack us a snack for the stand. I’m pretty sure that deer can smell peanut butter on saltines a mile away, but Pop let me pack the snacks and haul them up into the stand most times anyway. One of the sweetest memories I have of our deer hunting times was the time we had sat for awhile and saw NOTHING, so he took out his pocket knife and carved a heart with our initials in that tree. He sat up higher in the deer stand on the seat and I sat below him where I could see out too. He didn’t say a word that day, but he got out that pocket knife and quietly carved our initials and grinned that Jack grin at me while he worked. I don’t know where that tree even IS, but I love knowing that he made such a sweet gesture just for me.

Jack taught Charlie and me many things. Like I said, he taught me to swim underwater in that pond. He also taught me to drive a stick shift and let me practice by driving an old truck around and around their yard and land. He even let me drive into town before I had my learners license. Oh, I thought I was big stuff then…that is…until we saw a police car in town. I froze. I choked that truck out several times in a row on the highway, so Pop just laughed and had me sputter into a parking lot so he could take over behind the wheel. Macey knows that I first learned to drive about the time I was 12, so she started asking if she could learn this coming summer when SHE turns 12 too. Well, Pop found out about this and it thrilled him. We stayed with Gran and Pop over Thanksgiving break this past year and one day Pop got in his truck and took off for a little while. When he got back, he let Mama know that he had gone to put gas in the truck so Macey could drive. It wouldn’t do for anything else to happen other than Mama had to get Macey out in that truck (in her lap, of course) and let her drive. Pop sat on the porch and watched – happy as a clam. The only thing he DID NOT like was that they didn’t drive long enough for his liking. He said he had put twenty dollars worth of gas in that truck and they didn’t drive enough. That was our Pop  – always giving and wanting to do for his family.

Pop and Gran are the best grandparents in the world and, let me just say, they are also the best GREAT grandparents. Oh, how he loved his great grandbabies. The only thing that ever bothered him was that he just couldn’t get down and play with them like he really wanted to. But seeing them and being around them gave him great joy. And, when he COULD interact and play with them, he did. Our youngest, Mariana, got a doctor kit for Christmas and bought it down when we came to visit. Oh, he got the biggest kick out of her giving him check-ups during our visit. He typically would call her “Little Bit”, but after that he started to call her “Doc.” And, he always loved hearing stories of our children. In the fall before picture day, Mariana made a remark that she had on her “pretty face” that day. Gran told Pop about that and so he started referring to HIS pretty face and he would ask if we had on our pretty faces from day to day. These children brought so much joy to him, just as Charlie and I, and Mama and Lawrence before us, always did.

I got to spend this past Wednesday in the hospital with Pop and that is a day that I just feel so blessed to have had. When he was at home, he LOVED watching The Western Channel. Those cowboys, indians and outlaws were his companions. They didn’t have that channel at the hospital, to his dismay. Well, on Wednesday morning I cued up John Wayne’s movie “Hondo” on my iPad and he got to watch that before PT came to rake him over the coals – I mean, work with him. Netflix on the iPad wasn’t the Western channel, but he liked it. After PT, he was worn out, so he napped in the chair. I was hungry, so I got out a packet of peanut M&Ms and quietly tried to open them. Well, he heard me. He asked me what I was eating and when I said M&Ms, well…he had to have some. And, of course, I gave them to him. Even though he had not eaten anything off his lunch tray but ice cream. The man loved his sweets, what can I say?! He and I hung out that day and just took it easy as we could, except when PT was working with him. We watched Bonanza and The Rifleman. We didn’t do a whole lot of talking, but were just comfortable and content just being together….just him and me. And, I cannot even say how thankful I am to have had that time.

On Wednesday, Pop asked me if I thought he’d go home tomorrow, meaning Thursday. I was honest with him and told him no, that I thought he’d be in the hospital for awhile longer, but that if we worked hard on breathing exercises and PT, he would get to go home soon. He told me okay. Well, now that I think about it, Pop did go home on Thursday. Only, he didn’t go home to his favorite country place, he went to his eternal home in heaven. As much as we’re all going to miss him, I know we also celebrate that he’s in heaven and he’s whole again. I can just imagine him being reunited with his daddy who he absolutely ADORED and being together again with his “Buddy” Lawrence who he also completely adored. And, of course, I just imagine the joy he felt when he saw Jesus face to face. I have heard it said that those who have gone on to glory really wouldn’t trade places with those of us here, and I take comfort in that. He’s really HOME. I don’t know if there’s a greeting committee when we get to heaven, but, if there is, I hope Pop is at the head of mine when I get there so that I know I’m in the right place.

As I close, I reflect on a saying that gives me great comfort: “Thank you, Lord, for the pain we feel. It is the price we pay for having loved someone so much. It is worth it.” I am so grateful that I was loved so much by such an amazing granddaddy and that I got to love him so much in return. The pain of losing him sometimes washes over me like a tidal wave, but for having gotten to be his and have him be mine makes it worth it. For forty and a half years, I was his “Boo” and he was my “Jack” and that will bless me for the rest of my days until I see that precious man again one day, as I know I will.

***************

We miss you so much, Pop, and will always love you. But we know that heaven is amazing and we trust we’ll see you there one sweet day.

Love always,
Boo

 

One of my favorite photos I took of Pop recently. This was in September 2014 at one of Macey’s soccer matches, the day before both of our girls were baptized. 

 

Well, we are into week four of this school year already and we have a middle schooler in the house this year. MIDDLE SCHOOL. The very phrase has struck fear in my heart since the first day Macey walked into a kindergarten classroom. Every year of elementary, I would think that at least I had x more years until middle school. I don’t think I’m alone in that, right? I mean, seriously, who looks forward to middle school?! I think we can pretty much all agree that middle school is basically a big hormone casserole baked at around 98.6 for three years. Can I get a witness? So, yea, the dread was totally there. But, I’m here to say that it’s going well. Better than that, actually…it’s going great! Color me shocked and HAPPY!!

I actually started making peace with the whole middle school process last spring when I attended an open house for upcoming sixth grade parents. Just listening to administration and teachers gave me a peace because,  let’s be honest, this isn’t their first rodeo and they know how to help acclimate these kids to a new learning environment. It may not be the warm fuzzy adjustment of kindergarten, but that’s not what these adolescents need anyway. They are learning independence and gaining self-awareness, so what they need more than hand holding is some good old fashioned nudging along.

In our county, schools start/end at staggered times. So, we have Mariana going to elementary around 7:30am and we have Macey going to middle around 9am.  Then Mariana’s school dismisses at 2:20 while Macey is still in school until 4:15pm. This is a definite change from shuttling both girls to one school and picking both up at the same time. But, it’s working out quite well. Mariana decided to ride the bus this year, so that buys me extra time in the afternoons, then we go pick up Macey together and she does her reading and other homework in the carpool line. Bam. Problems solved!!

Now that we’re almost a full month into the middle school experience, I know we still have a LOT to learn, but I am thankful that the adjustment is going well. Macey is, step by step, learning to be a little more independent. Bless her, she still wants to ask her homeroom teacher a lot of questions, but she’s getting there. And, she’s learning better accountability because if she forgets, say, a binder or homework, well that doesn’t really fly.  The administrators and teachers at her school encourage us, as parents, to let the kids falter sometimes because it’s only in faltering that they can pull themselves back up and see that, hey, they ARE capable of redeeming themselves. We also believe in natural consequences in our family, so it’s also helpful to learn that good or bad, every action has a consequence attached to it. Granted, this is crazy hard to do sometimes, but these are excellent life lessons for the long haul.

I’m sure we’ll hit some bumps in the road along this way, but I feel good knowing that we’re at a middle school that is well run and looks out for its students. I feel confident in the teachers and administration which also goes a long way in helping me have peace with this whole transition. I’m serious when I say that I have literally dreaded these middle school years for ages. But, I’m seeing now that there is nothing to dread. Hey, it’s inevitable, so we might as well face it, right? And we call came through the hormone casserole our own selves. I won’t say it was all fun, but we all grew and learned from every experience along the way. So, I’m embracing this new season for Macey and our family. I won’t even go into the tween stuff today, that’s another post, but I say that middle school, as far as I can tell right now, isn’t going to be a stink pot. I think we’re going to enjoy it. In fact, I’m confident we will. And, who would have thought THAT?!

Blessings,

Kelly

I owe a proper update. I realize I fell off the blogging band wagon. Gracious, things have been SO busy. I hope to get to catch up properly tomorrow. 🙂